Earlier this week, I was going back through my oldest posts. Many right now are back in draft form, since I really hope to reformat them at some point. However, this one is live and so I’m here to add to it and reflect on it. Back in 2010, the original publish date, I was living in Kansas City, working at least two jobs, and trying desperately to get a job in the design field. I had been back from Glasgow for a little over a year and a half, and I was slowly going miserable. In those days, I wrote a lot about “where I see myself in ten years.” It was a huge time of reflection for me, and of soul-searching, and of dreaming big. Where DID I see myself in ten years, back in 2010? I have two years left on that … am I close? Have I shifted goals? Who am I now? The entire text of the original post (which likely still has the original date on it!) is below. My early 2018 reply is then below that.
where i see myself in ten years, circa 2010
When I was in college, a good friend told me that she liked to ask potential boyfriends “where do you see yourself in ten years?” and see what their answer was. For example, if they said “working at McDonalds” they probably weren’t husband material. She is now married to a pretty awesome guy who is perfect for her, and doesn’t see himself at McDonalds in ten years.
But I digress.
I recently thought about this question and I have to wonder.. How am I working toward my ten-year goal?
In ten years, I hope to be happy, working at a creative job, and successful (aka not living off of my savings account).
Right now, I don’t see this happening. I’m in a part time job that doesn’t pay enough to even pay the bills, let alone buy myself anything fun. I can’t find a job in any sort of design-related place. Restoration Hardware never called me back, nor did Pottery Barn. I got rejected from Hallmark within two days of applying. I continually get rejected from Gensler and other architecture firms I apply to.
And while I would love to start my own event design business, I can’t think of a name and my only client recently split from her fiance. I don’t know how to begin, and I don’t have any friends to throw ideas around with. How does one do it? Should I just print up some fliers that say “do you need an event planned? call #######?” Does that work? I don’t know anyone that’s looking to plan a party. I don’t have glamourous friends, I don’t work in a high-profile place where my coworkers have Christmas parties, etc… I’m just not that sort of person right now. I want to be, though, so how do I get there???
Oh… 2010 Sarah. It’s so easy to look back and say, well of course you were unhappy. And I’ll admit, I do that often. I flip back through my mental index of my life before the boat and wonder why I stayed so long when it was so clear I was unhappy. But I was comfortable. I went to work, I went to the gym, I went to the bar. Rarely did I travel, until 2012. Coincidentally, it was in 2011 that I realised I didn’t want to be an architect.
But how do I feel now about those words? About where I see myself in ten years, eight years in?
Honestly, it’s always the little words that jump out at me. “I would love to start my own event design business.” Hell, I did start a business this year! It’s not true event planning, but if you consider travel to be an event (and let’s face it, it is) then yes, I’m an event planner.
I also wrote, “I hope to be happy.” Am I happy?
You know what? I am.
I get to travel around, working from my computer, seeing family and friends around the world. My new career gives me the chance to visit new places, try new things, and meet new people. I have nothing tying me to one place – luckily, since even my own immediate family is usually in five different places on any given day.
does happiness equal success?
If happiness = success, then I am successful. However, I’m still living off my savings – ok, not cool. BUT building a business takes a huge amount of money at the start. Living, when you aren’t making the money yet, takes a huge amount of money. I know that because I found my passion (and I truly urge you to find your passion) it will come.
Could I have predicted this “where I see myself in ten years” eight years ago? No. Honestly. I was still hoping to be a successful designer, featured in magazines about furnishings and colour palettes. Not gallivanting around the world writing about places like Nepal, Dubai, and New Zealand. How spectacular it all really is.
Thanks, 2010 Sarah, for sharing your thoughts.